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    Home » Entertainment & Technology » 31+ Haunted House Jokes

    31+ Haunted House Jokes

    Entertainment & Technology

    This post may contain affiliate links view our disclosure

    Halloween is always a fun season for kids. You can share the laughs together with these funny (and clean!) haunted house jokes! All of these riddles and jokes have some connection to a haunted house! Halloween jokes are some of the best!

    You can find more Halloween Jokes for Kids to make the season even more festive!

    Haunted House Jokes for Kids

    31+ HAUNTED HOUSE JOKES FOR KIDS

    Q: When is the safest time to go into a haunted house?
    A: After Thanksgiving dinner – all the monsters are asleep on the couch.

    Q: What do young ghosts sell on the front lawn of their haunted houses?
    A: They have a demonade stand.

    Q: Why did Bob the builder say ‘no I can’t’ when asked to help fix a house?
    A: It was a haunted house.

    Q: Why did the haunted house scream?
    A: From window pain.

    Q: What little house is in the backyard of haunted houses?
    A: The werewolf house.

    Q: When is a haunted house door not a door?
    A: When it’s ajar.

    Q: Who greets you at the door of an old haunted house?
    A: The ghost host.

    Q: Why don’t doorbells in a haunted house ring?
    A: They’re afraid to make a sound.

    Q: Where do you find the scariest haunted houses?
    A: At the end of dead end streets.

    Q: Why can’t haunted houses have nice furniture?
    A: The black cats scratch them all up.

    Q: Did anyone like the haunted house’s front lawn Halloween decorations?
    A: Yes, they were a howling success.

    Q: What do they have to drink in haunted houses?
    A: Ghoulade.

    Q: Why didn’t the 10 ghosts let any more ghosts live in the haunted house?
    A: It was their terror-tory.

    Q: Why was the young ghost playing in the yard?
    A: His mummy was vacuuming their haunted house.

    Q: How did the haunted house get stolen paintings?
    A: They were from the polterheist.

    Q: What do young ghosts build in their playroom?
    A: Haunted forts.

    Q: Why are haunted houses so tall?
    A: They have hundreds of horror stories.

    Q: Why do lady ghosts like to haunt baseball fields instead of houses?
    A: Because diamonds are a girl ghost’s best friend.

    Q: Which haunted house room do ghosts never go into?
    A: The living room.

    Haunted House Halloween Jokes

    Q: What do you call a spooky house that everyone insults?
    A: A taunted house.

    Q: How do you open the door to a haunted house?
    A: With a skeleton key.

    Q: Why did the barbie doll run away?
    A: Her dollhouse was haunted.

    Q: What kind of TV do you find inside haunted houses?
    A: Big scream TVs.

    Q: What was for dinner at the haunted house?
    A: Ghoulash.

    Q: Why was the vampire thrown out of the haunted house?
    A: He kept trying to bite the guests.

    Q: Why don’t zombies go into haunted houses?
    A: They only chase live people.

    Q: Why are haunted houses like libraries?
    A: They’re both full of horror stories.

    Q: Why do haunted houses need so many closets?
    A: For all the brooms and boogeymen.

    Q: What do ghosts keep in the refrigerator?
    A: A sheet cake.

    Q: Why did the witch run around her bed?
    A: She wanted to catch up on her sleep.

    Q: What is the first sign your house is haunted?
    A: Your sheets are missing.

    Q: Why was the haunted house covered in spider webs?
    A: The ghosts wouldn’t let their pets inside.

    Q: Why didn’t the baby ghost like dressing in the living room?
    A: There was a couch potato with eyes all over it.

    Q: Why makes haunted houses even scarier?
    A: They’re a mess because the cleaning service is afraid to show up.

    Q: What’s for dessert at the haunted house?
    A: Booberry pie.

    Q: Where was the haunted zoo built?
    A: On top of a bearial ground.

    Q: Why was the haunted house’s mailbox painted the same colors as the local football team?
    A: The residents had a lot of team spirit.

    For more fun Halloween jokes for kids, check out our Pumpkin jokes!

    Halloween Haunted House Jokes and Riddles

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    Filed Under: Entertainment & Technology Tagged With: jokes & riddles

    About Mariah

    Mariah is the mom of 2 and a former educator (preschool - 4th grade & special education) with a degree in human development. As a busy mom living in with a multi-generational family under one roof (with 4 dogs!), life is sometimes chaotic! She aims to share easy ideas that we can all use in our lives! Read more about Mariah!

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