Halloween is always a fun season for kids. You can share the laughs together with these funny (and clean!) haunted house jokes! All of these riddles and jokes have some connection to a haunted house! Halloween jokes are some of the best!
You can find more Halloween Jokes for Kids to make the season even more festive!
31+ HAUNTED HOUSE JOKES FOR KIDS
Q: When is the safest time to go into a haunted house?
A: After Thanksgiving dinner – all the monsters are asleep on the couch.
Q: What do young ghosts sell on the front lawn of their haunted houses?
A: They have a demonade stand.
Q: Why did Bob the builder say ‘no I can’t’ when asked to help fix a house?
A: It was a haunted house.
Q: Why did the haunted house scream?
A: From window pain.
Q: What little house is in the backyard of haunted houses?
A: The werewolf house.
Q: When is a haunted house door not a door?
A: When it’s ajar.
Q: Who greets you at the door of an old haunted house?
A: The ghost host.
Q: Why don’t doorbells in a haunted house ring?
A: They’re afraid to make a sound.
Q: Where do you find the scariest haunted houses?
A: At the end of dead end streets.
Q: Why can’t haunted houses have nice furniture?
A: The black cats scratch them all up.
Q: Did anyone like the haunted house’s front lawn Halloween decorations?
A: Yes, they were a howling success.
Q: What do they have to drink in haunted houses?
A: Ghoulade.
Q: Why didn’t the 10 ghosts let any more ghosts live in the haunted house?
A: It was their terror-tory.
Q: Why was the young ghost playing in the yard?
A: His mummy was vacuuming their haunted house.
Q: How did the haunted house get stolen paintings?
A: They were from the polterheist.
Q: What do young ghosts build in their playroom?
A: Haunted forts.
Q: Why are haunted houses so tall?
A: They have hundreds of horror stories.
Q: Why do lady ghosts like to haunt baseball fields instead of houses?
A: Because diamonds are a girl ghost’s best friend.
Q: Which haunted house room do ghosts never go into?
A: The living room.
Q: What do you call a spooky house that everyone insults?
A: A taunted house.
Q: How do you open the door to a haunted house?
A: With a skeleton key.
Q: Why did the barbie doll run away?
A: Her dollhouse was haunted.
Q: What kind of TV do you find inside haunted houses?
A: Big scream TVs.
Q: What was for dinner at the haunted house?
A: Ghoulash.
Q: Why was the vampire thrown out of the haunted house?
A: He kept trying to bite the guests.
Q: Why don’t zombies go into haunted houses?
A: They only chase live people.
Q: Why are haunted houses like libraries?
A: They’re both full of horror stories.
Q: Why do haunted houses need so many closets?
A: For all the brooms and boogeymen.
Q: What do ghosts keep in the refrigerator?
A: A sheet cake.
Q: Why did the witch run around her bed?
A: She wanted to catch up on her sleep.
Q: What is the first sign your house is haunted?
A: Your sheets are missing.
Q: Why was the haunted house covered in spider webs?
A: The ghosts wouldn’t let their pets inside.
Q: Why didn’t the baby ghost like dressing in the living room?
A: There was a couch potato with eyes all over it.
Q: Why makes haunted houses even scarier?
A: They’re a mess because the cleaning service is afraid to show up.
Q: What’s for dessert at the haunted house?
A: Booberry pie.
Q: Where was the haunted zoo built?
A: On top of a bearial ground.
Q: Why was the haunted house’s mailbox painted the same colors as the local football team?
A: The residents had a lot of team spirit.
For more fun Halloween jokes for kids, check out our Pumpkin jokes!
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