**This post first appeared on our site kidsjokebook.com until we closed it and moved the content to thesimpleparent.com**
Birthdays are one of a kid’s favorite days! It is a day where they are number one and they get lots of presents. Celebrate the day with some of these awesomely funny birthday jokes!
Leave a comment on this post and share your favorite birthday jokes with us!
As always, all of our jokes are kid-friendly and clean. You can scroll down to the bottom of the post to get our FREE printable jokes that work great for lunchboxes or “joke of the day” fun! So scroll through our list and find your family’s favorite birthday puns and riddles!
BIRTHDAY JOKES
Q: What do you say to your cat on his birthday?
A: Happy purr-day.
Q: Why did the man get heartburn after eating birthday cake?
A: He forgot to take off the candles.
Q: How old was the cave man on his birthday?
A: Stone Age.
Q: What does every birthday end with?
A: The letter Y.
Q: What does a birthday cake and a baseball team have in common?
A: They both need good batters.
Q: Why are candles lit on top of birthday cakes?
A: It’s impossible to light them on the bottom.
Q: What did the grumpy birthday candle say at the party?
A: Birthdays burn me up.
Q: When would you hit a birthday cake with a hammer?
A: When it’s a pound cake.
Q: Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his piece of birthday cake?
A: He was stuffed.
Q: Where do you find the best birthday presents for cats?
A: In a cat-alogue.
Q: Which famous men were born on your birthday?
A: None – only babies are born!
Q: What kind of birthday’s do babies have?
A: Nappy ones.
Q: What do George Washington, Christopher Columbus and Abraham Lincoln all have in common?
A: They were all born on holidays!
Q: What did the ice cream say to the grumpy birthday cake?
A: What’s eating you?
Q: Why did the girl feel warm on her birthday?
A: Because people kept toasting her.
Q: What has wings, a long colorful tail, and wears a bow?
A: A birthday pheasant.
Q: Why are birthday so good for you?
A: I don’t know, but the people who have the most live the longest.
Q: Why did the boy get a pair of bunny ears as a gift?
A: So he could have a hoppy birthday
Q: How do you celebrate Moby Dick’s birthday?
A: With a whale of a party!
Q: What did the lioness say to her cub on his birthday?
A: It’s roar birthday.
Q: What goes up and never comes down?
A: Your age!
Q: Why did friends hide from Sue on her birthday?
A: They wanted her to be Sue-prised.
Q: What did the young elephant want for its birthday?
A: A trunkful of toys.
Q: Why did the boy put the birthday cake in the freezer?
A: Because he wanted to ice it.
Q: Why did the birthday cake want to go to the nurse’s office?
A: He was feeling crumby.
Q: What looks like half a birthday cake?
A: The other half.
Q: What do get every birthday?
A: Older!
Q: What song did they sing to the dancer on her birthday?
A: Tappy birthday to you, tappy birthday to you…
Q: What did the hermit crab do on his birthday?
A: He shellabrated.
Q: When is a golf ball like a birthday cake?
A: When it’s being sliced.
Q: Why did the boy stand on his head at the birthday party?
A: He thought they were having upside-down cake.
Q: Why did the boy get soap for his birthday?
A: It was a soaprize party!
Q: Which birthday party game do rabbits like most?
A: Musical hares.
Q: What kind of birthday cake do they serve in heaven?
A: Angel food cake.
Q: What do you sing to cows on their birthdays?
A: Happy birthday to moo…
Q: Why was the birthday cake so hard?
A: It was a marble cake.
Q: What did the cat ask to eat on her birthday?
A: Cake with MICE cream!
Q: Why couldn’t cavemen send birthday cards?
A: The stamps kept falling off the rocks
Q: Why did the boy wear a tuxedo on his birthday?
A: So he would have great presence.
Q: Which side of a birthday cake is never eaten?
A: The left side…
Q: What happens when no one shows up to your birthday party?
A: You CAN have your cake and eat it too.
Q: Why did the boy put candles on the toilet?
A: He wanted to have a birthday potty.
Q: What kind of birthday cake do elves always ask for?
A: Shortcake.
Q: How can you tell if an elephant’s been to your birthday party?
A: He left footprints in the ice cream!
Q: Does a green candle burn longer than a yellow one?
A: No, they both burn shorter!
Q: What did the birthday balloon say to the pin?
A: Hi, Buster.
Q: What did one candle say to another candle?
A: Don’t birthdays burn you up?
Q: What did the birthday cake say to the ice cream?
A: You’re cool!
Q: What do you give 900-pound gorilla for his birthday?
A: I don’t know, but you’d better hope he likes it!
Q: What do you say to a kangaroo on its birthday?
A: Hoppy Birthday.
Q: What is it about birthdays that make kangaroos unhappy?
A: They only get to celebrate them in leap years.
Q: What sort of birthday cake do ghosts prefer?
A: I Scream Cake.
PRINTABLE BIRTHDAY JOKES
Be sure to download your FREE birthday jokes lunch box printable. You can print these lunchbox notes to leave around the house or surprise your kids in their lunch in the days leading up to their birthday! If you want to do a joke-a-day with your family, all you need is an 8.5″ x 11″ sheet of paper and a printer!
CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD YOUR FREE PRINTABLE.
Comment and tell us a birthday joke!
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