31 HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS
Humor can go such a long way and one of my favorite things to do with the kids is laugh. A little laughter can make a not-so-great day into a better one and can even turn a good day into a fabulous one! We also love the holidays around here and Halloween is the first one that really kicks it off in our house. So Halloween jokes and Halloween riddles have become part of our family tradition now that the kids love jokes. Whether you share these with your kids or just amuse yourself, be sure to let us know which ones are your favorites!
FUNNY HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS
Q: What do you call a dancing ghost? A: Polka-haunt-us. Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance? A: The muenster mash! Q: When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims? A: On Fry Day. Q: How do you write a book about Halloween? A: With a ghostwriter. Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch? A: At the casketeria. Q: Why do vampires need mouthwash? A: They have bat breath. Q: What is a vampire’s favorite holiday? A: Fangsgiving. Q: What did one ghost say to the other ghost? A: “Do you believe in people?” Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost? A: Bamboo. Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite ride at the carnival? A: The roller ghoster. Q: When does a ghost have breakfast? A: In the moaning. Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin’ Goblin.MORE FUNNY HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS
Q: What is in a ghost’s nose? A: Boogers. Q: What do you call a little monsters parents? A: Mummy and Deady. Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire? A: You suck. Q: What is a Skeleton’s favorite song? A: Bad to the Bone. Q: What did the witch do on her birthday? A: She spellabrates. Q: What’s a monster’s favorite bean? A: A human bean. Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? A: No, they eat the fingers separately. Q: What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes? A: A cereal killer. Q: How does a witch tell time? A: She looks at her witch watch. Q: What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost? A: Don’t spook until you’re spoken to. Q: What is a vampire’s favorite sport? A: Casketball. Q: What do birds give out on Halloween night? A: Tweets.
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween? A: Fettuccini Afraid-o. Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking? A: A pumpkin patch. Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor? A: Veinilla. Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations? A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind. Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling? A: High-spirited. Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch? A: Fish and ships. Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup? A: Vanishing cream. 
I like What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor is my favorite.
My favorite is Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
I like:
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
My favorite one is the vampires favorite ice cream flavor.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
I thought the one
What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.
I like the one about why mummies done take vacation
I like tis one: What do birds give out for Halloween? Tweets!
My favorite Halloween riddle is the Fettuccine Afraid-o!!
The pumpkin patch one is my favorite
Q: What is a Skeleton’s favorite song?
A: Bad to the Bone.
Fettuccini Afraid-o
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
This is my favorite: Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations. A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Love the “Fettucine Afraid-O” joke! All are cute, though!
I liked the Pumpkin Patch one the most
My favorite joke:
Why don’t mummies take vacations?
They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
I like Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling? A: High-spirited.
I liked the Hoblin’ Goblin joke.
I like this one and so did my kids
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Grandchildren have agreed that this is the best for our family :
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
We like – What do you call a witch’s garage? – a broom closet!
What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
Mummies
What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
Mummies
I like this one the best!
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
My favorite is What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor? Veinilla
My favorite joke was about the vampires favorite flavor being Veinilla.
i love this one! Q: What did the witch do on her birthday? A: She spellabrates.
What do Italians eat on Halloween?
Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Q: What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes?
A: A cereal killer.
What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
Fish and ships.
I like this one:
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking? A pumpkin patch
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
There were many jokes that I appreciated. This was one of them:
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
“What do birds give out on Halloween night? Tweets.” I like this one!
I like thr one What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don’t spook until you’re spoken to.
My favorite is:
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
Q: What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?
A: Hope it’s Halloween!!
Oh I have have a few favorites! I will say Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
A: The muenster mash!
So funny! 🙂
My favorite is Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind
I like the What do sea monsters eat for lunch? one.
I like this one.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Q: When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims?
A: On Fry Day.
My favorite one is Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
I like the Witch Watch joke.
Q: Why do vampires need mouthwash?
A: They have bat breath.
Q: What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.
Too funny! Makes me think of The Borrowers.
-Lauren
I like this joke–
Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
A: The muenster mash!
My favorite is ‘what do you call a ghost on the ceiling?’. LOL. Thanks for the giveaway!
My favorite is the Q: What do birds give out on Halloween night?
A: Tweets.
I like the vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor riddle.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
What do female ghosts use to do their makeup. LOL
I like this one!
Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling?
A: High-spirited.
I like – Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
I love this one:
Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling?
A: High-spirited.
My favorite riddle is:
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
My favorite is:
What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin’ Goblin
Thank you!
My favorite one is: Q: How do you write a book about Halloween? A: With a ghostwriter.
My favorite:
Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
A: Fish and ships.
My favorite:
Q: When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims?
A: On Fry Day.
The Why do vampires need mouth wash joke made me laugh
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
haha!!
My favorite is: Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? A: No, they eat the fingers separately.. I am also sure there is a good joke about using their brains!!!
this one is my favorite
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
my fav:
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
LOL My favorite joke is: Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
It’s corny but funny.
My favorite joke is this one:
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
This one is my favorite: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch? At the casketeria.
My favorite is: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A human bean.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Q: What do you call a dancing ghost?
A: Polka-haunt-us.
This one is my favorite! 😀
Q: How does a witch tell time?
A: She looks at her witch watch.
Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A: You suck
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
My favorite is Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
Why do Vampires need mouthwash? Because they have bat breath lol
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
That is too adorable. <3
The pumpkin patch one was my favorite!!
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Is my favorite.
What do you give a pumpkin to quit smoking?
A pumpkin patch
My fav joke is:
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
My son’s favorite food is Fettuccine Alfredo so I would pick What do Italians eat on Halloween? Answer: Fettuccini Afraid-O
My favorites the Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o. Its cute!
My favorite one is:
Q: What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don’t spook until you’re spoken to.
My favorite has to be What do birds give out on Halloween night? Tweets!
My favorite is What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking, a pumpkin patch
I thought this joke was pretty funny ,,.Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Being Italian this one is my favorite.
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween? A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
I love what does a witch do for her birthday? She spellabrates. Too cute!
I like Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations? A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind. Sounds a little familiar–like my hubby lol
Italians eat Fettucini -Afraid-O on Halloween!
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
My favorite is the ghost asking the other ghost if it “believes in people”.
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Is my fave!
My favorite is what do sea monsters eat for lunch? Fish and ships!
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
Mummies
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
I like what birds give out on Halloween nights. Tweets.
Ha ha these are great
My favorite is:
Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
A: The muenster mash!
What do you call a ghost on the ceiling? High Spirited
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch . so cute
The one that made me laugh the most:
Q: What do you call a dancing ghost?
A: Polka-haunt-us.
A lot of funny ones.
Thanks for the contest.
Q: What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don’t spook until you’re spoken to.
This is my favorite!
My favorite is:
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
I love the pumpkin patch one.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.
I like the vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor one! So cute!!
I like ‘What is a skeleton’s favorite song?’
Bad to the Bone
I like the vampire’s favorite ice cream one. 🙂
I like What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking? A pumpkin patch
Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
A: Fish and ships.
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
My favorite is Q: What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
A: “Do you believe in people?”
My favorite one is Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla. Hahahahaha.
I liked this one!
Q: Why do vampires need mouthwash?
A: They have bat breath.
I liked the joke of “What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?”, as I mean spook until you’re spoken to…Lol.
What do moms dress up as for Halloween? Mummies
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
My husband got badly burned 8 weeks ago & I told him that he could be a mummy for Halloween, because of all his bandages.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
my favorite joke is the cereal killer joke.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch
This one is my favorite.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite holiday?
A: Fangsgiving.
I like Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
I like What do you call when you cross Bambi with a ghost? A bamboo!
My favorite is:
Q: How do you write a book about Halloween?
A: With a ghostwriter.
The “What do Italians eat on Halloween” riddle is a good one!
Why don’t mummies take vacations?
They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
This one —>
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
I like this one, Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
My favorite is:
Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling?
A: High-spirited.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost? Bamboo
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
I’m going to go with:
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Thanks for the chance.
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
It’s hard to come by experienced people for this topic, however, you sound like you know what you’re talking about!
Thanks
awesome content!