When we were gathering our favorite Halloween Jokes for Kids, there were a few that went over the kids’ heads just a little bit. Those are the jokes and riddles that ended up on our list of Halloween Jokes for Adults!
We did keep this list family-friendly even though there are definitely some funny Halloween jokes that go in a different adult direction. So you’re safe sharing this jokes and riddles with the kids, even if they don’t quite catch the punch line!
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31 HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS
Humor can go such a long way and one of my favorite things to do with the kids is laugh. A little laughter can make a not-so-great day into a better one and can even turn a good day into a fabulous one!
We also love the holidays around here and Halloween is the first one that really kicks it off in our house. So Halloween jokes and Halloween riddles have become part of our family tradition now that the kids love jokes.
Whether you share these with your kids or just amuse yourself, be sure to let us know which ones are your favorites!
FUNNY HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS
Q: What do you call a dancing ghost?
A: Polka-haunt-us.
Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
A: The muenster mash!
Q: When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims?
A: On Fry Day.
Q: How do you write a book about Halloween?
A: With a ghostwriter.
Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A: At the casketeria.
Q: Why do vampires need mouthwash?
A: They have bat breath.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite holiday?
A: Fangsgiving.
Q: What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
A: “Do you believe in people?”
Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo.
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite ride at the carnival?
A: The roller ghoster.
Q: When does a ghost have breakfast?
A: In the moaning.
Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
A: Hoblin’ Goblin.
MORE FUNNY HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS
Q: What is in a ghost’s nose?
A: Boogers.
Q: What do you call a little monsters parents?
A: Mummy and Deady.
Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A: You suck.
Q: What is a Skeleton’s favorite song?
A: Bad to the Bone.
Q: What did the witch do on her birthday?
A: She spellabrates.
Q: What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
Q: What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes?
A: A cereal killer.
Q: How does a witch tell time?
A: She looks at her witch watch.
Q: What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don’t spook until you’re spoken to.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite sport?
A: Casketball.
Q: What do birds give out on Halloween night?
A: Tweets.
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling?
A: High-spirited.
Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
A: Fish and ships.
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
Halloween Riddles for Adults Are Important (THERE’S PROOF!)
Although I work from home these days, I spent many years working with fellow teachers. It can be a stressful job for sure! Humor and jokes were always a great way for us to relax and let off a little steam.
I read this article about why telling jokes is a key to success at work and it made so much sense! We all deserve to laugh sometimes (as long as it’s appropriate, of course)!
This time of year telling some of these Halloween jokes for adults can help reduce stress, increase productivity, and really just makes us all feel a little bit better during a time when life can start to feel really chaotic!
HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR ADULTS GIVEAWAY
If you’re like us, you’ve already purchased a few new Halloween decorations! We got ours at Target so in honor of Halloween jokes we’re offering one lucky reader a $25 Target gift card so you can stock up too!
The giveaway is open to US residents, age 18 and older, and ends on Tuesday, September 25th at 11:59pm CT.
To enter for your chance to win, leave a comment telling me which one of these Halloween riddles for adults is your favorite!
[click_to_tweet tweet=”Share your favorite #Halloween joke & be entered to win a $25 Target GC from @thesimpleparent! #giveaway ” quote=”Share your favorite #Halloween joke & be entered to win a $25 Target GC from @thesimpleparent! #giveaway “]
I like What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor is my favorite.
My favorite is Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
I like:
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
My favorite one is the vampires favorite ice cream flavor.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
I thought the one
What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.
I like the one about why mummies done take vacation
I like tis one: What do birds give out for Halloween? Tweets!
My favorite Halloween riddle is the Fettuccine Afraid-o!!
The pumpkin patch one is my favorite
Q: What is a Skeleton’s favorite song?
A: Bad to the Bone.
Fettuccini Afraid-o
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
This is my favorite: Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations. A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Love the “Fettucine Afraid-O” joke! All are cute, though!
I liked the Pumpkin Patch one the most
My favorite joke:
Why don’t mummies take vacations?
They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
I like Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling? A: High-spirited.
I liked the Hoblin’ Goblin joke.
I like this one and so did my kids
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Grandchildren have agreed that this is the best for our family :
Q: What do Italians eat on Halloween?
A: Fettuccini Afraid-o.
We like – What do you call a witch’s garage? – a broom closet!
What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
Mummies
What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
Mummies
I like this one the best!
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
My favorite is What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor? Veinilla
My favorite joke was about the vampires favorite flavor being Veinilla.
i love this one! Q: What did the witch do on her birthday? A: She spellabrates.
What do Italians eat on Halloween?
Fettuccini Afraid-o.
Q: What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes?
A: A cereal killer.
What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
Fish and ships.
I like this one:
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking? A pumpkin patch
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
There were many jokes that I appreciated. This was one of them:
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
“What do birds give out on Halloween night? Tweets.” I like this one!
I like thr one What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don’t spook until you’re spoken to.
My favorite is:
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
Q: What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?
A: Hope it’s Halloween!!
Oh I have have a few favorites! I will say Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
A: The muenster mash!
So funny! 🙂
My favorite is Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind
I like the What do sea monsters eat for lunch? one.
I like this one.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Q: When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims?
A: On Fry Day.
My favorite one is Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately.
I like the Witch Watch joke.
Q: Why do vampires need mouthwash?
A: They have bat breath.
Q: What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.
Too funny! Makes me think of The Borrowers.
-Lauren
I like this joke–
Q: What do you call a cheesy Halloween dance?
A: The muenster mash!
My favorite is ‘what do you call a ghost on the ceiling?’. LOL. Thanks for the giveaway!
My favorite is the Q: What do birds give out on Halloween night?
A: Tweets.
I like the vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor riddle.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Veinilla.
What do female ghosts use to do their makeup. LOL
I like this one!
Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling?
A: High-spirited.
I like – Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Q: What do you give to a pumpkin trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch.
I love this one:
Q: What do you call a ghost on the ceiling?
A: High-spirited.
My favorite riddle is:
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: Vanishing cream.
My favorite is:
What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin’ Goblin
Thank you!